Thursday, September 8, 2016

Rupauls Drag Race All Stars 2 Episode 2 Snatch Game / Latex Runway… Tatiannas got a problem.

Im sorry this one has to be brief as Im way late because I went to Southern Decadence and got back a day late and then came home and it was Alvaros birthday so Im basically just a SPENT MESS. Southern Decadence is cute, the people are nice, but EH, you're not missing anything. It was very small and if you're not a big drinker you might find it difficult. There is no particular scene or moment at the entire thing which is kinda nice but STANDING THERE DRINKING is more of a ONE DAY thing at most for me. Then Alvaro accidentally booked the flight back for Tuesday not Monday so at that point I was just pretending the hotel was a CRUISE SHIP and I pretty much sat there the entire day going back and forth from our room to the Club Room where they served food and cocktails to my bath tub, and back again. It got to the point where I resented having to wear clothes or having to bend over to put shoes on if that tells you anything about the comfort level I had going on. Its that point where you're in completely luxurious surroundings but because you're so relaxed and well fed EVERYTHING IS HARD, and by hard I mean IM A TERRIBLE PERSON. Then we got home and it was Alvaros birthday so my gift to him was that I shaved off all my body hair because in Spain thats considered sexy. I know its weird but go there and you'll see it the hot straight guys are all SHAVED (Im assuming this is because they're all so hairy and to be hairy is to be like your dad so they all shave the whole thing) so being 6' 3" that only took like SIX HOURS. Then he came home and daddy WRECKED MY SHAVED TWAT for a long time but also MADE ME do all these poppers so my BRAIN HURTS at this very moment, but Id do it again! Why, BECAUSE I AM A WOMAN IN LOVE! lol Im seriously listening to this right now as I write this and its LOUD, there was a day I played Too Funky at top volume, now its Woman in Love…Ugh.. I used to imagine myself a Mugler model, now I model myself after a nearly elderly jewess..Eh Ill take it, at least its cozy.
Ok so things we need to briefly discuss. Adore left. She got spooked by Michelle clocking her shitty look. However I did relate to her when Michelle said "its not personal" Ummmm... "its not personal" ALWAYS means its EXACTLY AND ONLY PERSONAL AND THAT SUCKS.
The runway portion of the show needs to hold more weight. I feel its more interesting AND its the opportunity for the contestant to show themselves off and what their THING is. The weekly challenge is more like doing what someone else tells you to do which is limiting and doesn't necessarily feature your own abilities. The runway portion is "Let me show you what I can do" and Im FAR more interested in seeing how their mind works via their decision making process regarding the appearance they designed and choose to present. This is where Tatianna FUCKS UP. I kinda feel like A LOT of people like Taitianna. I really like her. She's beautiful and seems kind and I like her vibes. WHAT THE FUCK THOUGH?!?! TATI.. HAVE YOU CONSIDERED LETTING STYING INTO YOUR LIFE?! How can someone be so involved in a world and NOT understand quite possible the most important aspect of it?! Tatianna has ZERO concept of style.. AT ALL. She is that person that I have no idea how they exist where they cannot put a look together. NOT ONE LOOK. Like WHAT IS THIS????? WHAT…. IS…… THIS????? its so out of place and WRONG its ALMOST INVENTIVE?!?!? What exactly is the direction with this?? Its so interesting, she's so clearly concerned with the physical appearance the styling just isn't important to her, its just not part of the equation…. I don't know how to help you Tati, I like you A LOT. I didn't want to see you go, but what was the shitty "fetish" look??? I mean… gu… re… (thats me not being able to finish saying GURL or REALLY because I'm so frustrated).. hopefully she comes back. Im thinking this whole "you're not dead yet" thing will basically be a two team split thing where the chopped and non chopped will actually form teams. The only problem with that is it will be the people nobody likes versus the cool kids so it won't even have any impact. I feel like if Detox were able to style Tati they could be really good, but cmon Coco and Ginger Minj are DEAD MEAT and like the sick wildebeest having them around means EVERYONE DIES.
Snatch game was fine, Alaska was great as Mae West, kinda shocking that nobody knew who she was at the bar I was watching it in. Alyssa as usual was nothing more than herself and running other characters through that filter is always great as its nothing like what its supposed to be but is some surrealist texan drag queen insane-o-filter which makes things WAY more interesting. In fact its the entire reason I watch the show actually now that I think about it. I want to see how the world is filtered and then put back together again through another persons eyes. Its why I have such a strong personal interest in the show and the queens individually and why it feels so nice when someone gets it "right" in my eyes. You find a kindred spirit and that makes you feel like you're not alone, which is something I think creative people often have an issue with.
Ginger was totally OFF, Tammie never had that hair, the make up wasn't nearly heavy enough.. I mean how could you fuck that up?! Trixie does it EVERY DAY and she doesn't even mean to?! Detox was not so great, its that problem is that thing I said before. She's a STRONG personality and cannot be anything other than herself which is attractive to me. Kinda like Raven or ME, I FAIL MISERABLY every time I'm told to behave a different way then what I am naturally but if you just let me be me I sparkle. Which brings us to the runway portion of the show.. Detox killed it for the exact reason mentioned above. This is the strong suit of a strong personality. Let me do what I want and it will be great. I wonder if an "alpha" thing? Like you can't tell an alpha personality how to behave, it just doesn't work, don't put them on a team, don't ask them to meet your needs its not what kind of machine they are. Detox and Alaska were the best. Alaska wore a horrible shoe though that I spooked on the runway and felt vindicated when that other queen randomly clocked it too. I mean smoked latex and THAT SHOE?
I was so happy it was a latex runway shoe. OF COURSE Ginger completely didn't get what that means and didn't even wear latex but wore polyurethane garbage if she had done FAT CATWOMAN I would have given her points for nerve. Roxxy also sucked. She TOTALLY should have gone home. The final three were Tati, Detox and Roxxy. Gimme a break Roxxy so deserved to die. Detox didn't even belong there. Alaska and Katya did the lip synch and Alaska was completely smart about it and gave us the HER SHOW, don't ever try and be something you're not, if you can't dance give us I CANT DANCE and it will be a success. Its always the smart move, being you its never a FAIL. Even if YOU are the FAIL. Its a win win. Alaska really nailed it and deserved the win by far. Katya however was a weird flat disappointment. She put on a bodysuit and then didn't do anything, I'm assuming she's holding back???
Im exhausted and have to eat, and now I'm grouchy because i wrote this instead of eating, leave me alone I hate you.

Monday, August 29, 2016

Rupauls Drag Race All Stars 2 Episode 1 Recap / Character Breakdown

All Stars 2 is goooooooood, so good. It really does make a huge difference to have no filler personalities. Being its only the first episode and I already did a recap Im just going to do a character breakdown.

Ginger Minj: The "hair in my food" of drag. I feel the Earth would be better if every element of her existence/aspect of her being/taste level was wiped from the annals of history. You cannot be friends with everyone and actively NOT being friends gives you something to do with a person you didn't appreciate so now at least you both have something to do?! It makes your life a little more exciting to have an enemy no? Now this said Im going to say. Everything she does… for her genre.. is correct. Perhaps that is her flaw, without ever having been punk "correct" is REPULSIVE. She IS actually talented. Her make up is done well. The garments fit correctly and she even looked cute for what she is in the intro so I will NOT clock her abilities. She can even sing. For what she is, she's well done. This doesn't matter for me however, I like NONE OF IT. I don't like realizing that we share the same plane of consciousness even, its insulting to me, I don't want to share this plane of consciousness with her entire cast of concepts.

Phi-Phi: She walked into the work room wearing a bridge-line by Mrs Kasha Davis sold EXCLUSIVELY at PARTY CITY of all places and delivered a rhyme THAT DIDNT EVEN RHYME?!?!?!?!?!? WTF is she doing here? She doesn't even get drag. Why is she really doing any of this? What is your intention person?! STOP TRYING TO GET ME TO LIKE YOU. GO INTO ANOTHER BUSINESS! FLEE!, Flea O'hara!

Coco Montrese aka KooKoo Spray-cheese: Poor thing. Imagine you get cast on a tv show and you still can't collect enough bills to get that missing tooth filled in?!? We all went from being mean to being like OH GOD SOMEONE HELP HER?! You can't make fun of her. She's fighting … TO STAY ALIVE. Let her be, I doubt she even knows where she is anymore.

Roxxy Andrews: Looked better fat.

Kataya: Ok, whatever. She's fine. I don't dislike. I enjoy her though Im suspect of her intentions, and that makes it very hard for me to like her. I can't get into a phony but she's still on the "good" side.

Detox: The reading segment could have been funnier. The black light show could have been BLACKER, but thats not her fault thats just tv lighting etc. The concept was clever for her being she's more of a personality for me and doesn't really need to do a show. I worry she's a TOUCH aloof and Ru does not like aloof or pretentious, not that Dee is pretentious at all but thats why Maxx got the chop. I just know Ru a teeny bit and what I know is she kinda hates a pretentious queen or someone who doesn't outwardly express their need/want/desire. Yet ANOTHER reason why Detox and I share similarities. My relationship to need is super bad. Because my mom and dad divorced at like me being 4/5 I have a HARD TIME with attachment/need. In my brain I basically got dumped by my dad who I was in love with as a baby and from then on was like I WILL NEVER SUFFER THAT HUMILIATION AND PAIN AGAIN. Thats a lot for a 5 year old to decide but I couldn't help being an oedipal WINNER and it actually made me an alpha personality late in life which made me mildly successful (Im happy at least), but also a person VERY uncomfortable with closeness. Luckily around 38 I began to return to being available otherwise I would have just faded away or become a drug addict or who knows what fate would have had for me if I never made an effort to be accessible again. I still have so much shit to work on but at least I'm doing it. When I see people who don't/won't/can't look inward I just KNOW a DRUG ADDICTION is on the way. I've seen it so many times. The lucky ones get sober but its always nice to try and get there before the drug spiral that is so common with the gays especially. That said I still have TONS OF SHIT to work on, for example If I see you out in the world and I want to know you there is a MILD chance Ill have the balls to be upfront and smile hello to a stranger, but the usual method I employ to "make interest crystal clear" is by walking by you and trying to make you feel invisible. ISNT THAT NICE?! What you don't realize is I am hyper conscious of EVERY GESTURE and would LOVE to say HI:) but instead what you get is a wildly over analyzed process of calculations which involves me trying to make myself look as good as possible while simultaneously making it look like I'm completely unaware of any of this and its a completely effortless gesture and all of this is NATURAL and WHY WOULD I EVEN SEE YOU IM BUSY?!… What a dumb cunt I can be. I work step by step / day by day to rid myself of this. UGH, How walking down the street and seeing another queen walking toward you is so anxiety inducing! Like do I look at them, do I not look at them, if I'm looking do I look insane? If I don't am I a cunt? At what point do I smile? Is me smiling a weird gesture? I hate it. I don't know why I haven't gotten better at this, and sometimes it feels Im getting worse. Sometimes I honestly feel like I have a hard time leaving the house because I don't know how to react to people. I refuse to do the "SUDDENLY MY iPhone IS SUPER IMPORTANT" thing though, I at least know thats just dumb. I just bite the bullet and find some building to look at till they're close enough and then I look and smile small-ly. BABY STEPS down the street. I wish I had some of my friends abilities to just be upfront and honest with my feelings. Its such a great talent that benefits you so well.

Alaska: Her nose seems so far up Michelles ass her name should be New Jersey. I like Alaska a lot and I feel this entire thing is made just for her. Whatever sure...

Alyssa: The Don Knotts of drag. Ma'am...What the hell was that puppet?! She's not going to win but she doesn't even have to she's fantastic as is. Just keep being you lady, you're a crack up and gorgeous to boot.

Tatiana: WOW she looks GOOOOD! Sooo glad she's here. I was hoping she would win the lip synch but she got a little monotonous with her gestures and never incorporated kicks?!?! I was waiting for the kicks?! LEGS ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ARMS! I like that she was influenced by like those horrible MTV poetry slam shows.. GROSSS lol Most likely this very second Russel Simmons is sitting on a dildo imagining its her saying THANK YOU in variable tones of intensity.

Adore: That dress really was bad, and I like her on the show but in reality she was super uncharming. On that cruise she had a posse of twats and was totally the opposite of tv personality. Also her usage of "punk", "Goth", ""grunge" is ICKY, like gurlll.. I know they sell that shit all at Hot Topic so YOU think its all sorta the same because you were never there BUT IT ISNT. You are the opposite of punk. I can buy your look in a box at Spencers, that is not punk. HOWEVER, she is one of two queens that referenced Pete Burns at for that she gets a permanent gold star. This is a Gif of the superstar PETE BURNS, not Adore.

Thursday, August 25, 2016

Rupauls Drag Race All Stars 2 Precap

Thank god its All Stars 2 FINALLY. So the game is set up with the A game predators versus the people nobody cares about. I mean factually the most hated RPDR contestants are Flee-Flea, Ginga-vitus, and "Chubby Liar Girl" who thinks collecting dollar bills is entertainment (Roxy Andrews, see my review of the RPDR Cruise to see my sweet review of her talents), Coco is kinda in there but she's more like the person at your summer job that you wish you never became friends with but now you're stuck with her. We don't really HATE her, its more like a "I wish she wasn't here but I feel bad." You'll be shocked to hear this but I don't even wanna get into the negativity spiral I'll fall into talking about Ginger Minge. (No picture posted out of kindness of author) I mean, just, ewww, southern, short, fat, bitchy, tacky, not intelligent, religious, a blob of yuck. Who ever her audience is I don't want to be near it. Phi-Phi… ugh.. You know why she's the worst??? Because she gets by on NERVE…. I HAAAAATE people who get by on NERVE. They don't have the talent, but they believe in themselves so they actually make work, hence the 365 days of drag she did. Like YES, I DO give her points for NERVE for that, I'll even give her a nod of respect for EFFORT, but NERVE IS REPULSIVE. Do you know how many great talents I know that DONT have nerve because they actually respect the arts and feel they're not good enough?! The fact that she thinks SHE can make work with her pool of references being as shallow as she is is ANGERING?!!! Like I love a "low" reference but that has to be balanced with a "deep" reference, to which she has none. She has 365 days of cheap, low rent, overly applied, irrelevant characters from Nickelodeon, shot from one angle! Hooray for you. Wheres the high reference? Theres one wild card with Tatiana, which Im actually interested in seeing. and then the TOP PREDATORS we all like.
Im gonna say this though. Im already over Katayas forced, over-compensating, false "excitement", false "self deprecation", please tone that fake laugh down because its making feel simultaneously preyed upon and sorry for you. Does anyone else see that? Its CREEPY?! Like I like her but thats, dare I say, a "RED" flag (that was a communist pun if you didn't catch it). Id hate her more for it but its usually a trait done by someone who just wants to make people happy at the cost of being not genuine to themselves so I'll keep her in the good pile but she's bottom tier good pile. I imagine the younger audience that is the primary RPDR audience doesn't catch this. Like the first two minutes of seeing Kataya I was like FORMER COKE HEAD, and I was right. Which is NOT a read mind you because lord knows we all have problems but Im just saying you can kinda clock peoples methods of behavior even through the editing of the tv show pretty quickly, if you pay attention to people. I happen to love observing/deconstructing people but thats of course just because I'm insecure and need to try and control my world around me so I have to break people down and reorganize them into my own limited perspective which is actually a defense mechanism I should probably move on from because it doesn't serve me but for TV SAKE ITS FUN OK SO STOP JUDGING ME?!?!;)
Detox is obviously my favorite and I hope she wins but I feel this entire game might be an Alaska set up. I really like Alaska but I also feel she's sorta like Willam in the way where they're sorta talents that are out of the loop of drag and more like personalities but not "Drag Queens" does that make sense? I feel Detox is more a professional drag queen and Alaska is like a person who uses drag as an element to their character but the drag isn't the hook? I dunno, its hard to explain but I feel if its a drag competition Detox should get the crown. I know the people behind the scenes like Alaska a lot soooo. Detox is very specific and not for beginners. Im attracted to stunning but also DANGEROUS at the same time. Its my aesthetic interest in everything and Detox embodies that. Like any strong sexual predator in female form she smells like an astray full of Angel, cigarettes, cash, and cum but SECRETLY you know thats all just a ROBOT SUIT because she's actually a sweet kid who had to build a coat of IMPENETRABLE SHINY PURPLE SPIKED ARMOUR to operate from inside and I relate to and respect that. Its sorta beautiful to see the design of the body they've made for themselves and to know theres still something sweet and tender operating from underneath. Its like going to an exotic car show, or the hall of armor at a museum, or the Orchid house.. I like to see what kind of dangerous beauty people have designed for themselves to operate from under and thats why I relate to Detox so well, we went to the same design school of artifice.. If the driver inside is gone however, too hidden, its tragic but with Detox I can see the driver. She's the Mugler woman and gets all the right references. I appreciate her severity, Im thankful for it even. I feel with Detox being there I have representation. Violette and Ms Fame were Mugler types but I require a HARDER TOUCH, delicate doesn't do anything for me unless the creature has venomous elements to it and to ring too "pretty" errs on being too compliant for me. Its too strong of a nod to a submissive nature. I want to be THREATENED, its the only way Im going to respect you. The sheepskin hat she wears that references Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction is just a big THANK YOU.
Im bored of writing this so I assume you're bored of reading this as well. Alyssa, Detox, Alaska for top three. Sorry I didn't go on about Alyssa but we all love alyssa so whats there to say? I feel she wont win because there isn't a big enough change though but theres not a big change because none of us want her to change.
Oh I forgot about Hot Topic Girl.. what was her name?? Oh hmm well heres something...

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Rupauls Drag Race Season 8 episode 8 Book Looks and Autobiographical stroll down the runway.

I haven't watched Untucked yet because I watch it with Alvaro and that means I have to wait but I also want to get this review out for you guys so Im going to write it without the Untucked. Were going to write the review backwards today because I feel like a BIG THING just sorta slid under the radar and its something Ive been asking Ru since season 2 which is WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE SONGS SUNG BY MEN?!?!? Finally it happened, aptly with Sylvester… BIG SHOES TO FILL….. This is a BIG THING because basically now were saying FISHY ISNT THAT IMPORTANT because were now segueing into FIERCE IS FIERCE AND WE DONT CARE ABOUT THE GENITALS SO MUCH. I mean YES, it will of course remain DRAG but I feel this really opens a lot of creative doors while simultaneously letting basic fishy queens know that their concepts might be dated and and in need of some remodeling. I mean could you imagine that first queen who got chopped pulling off Sylvester???… NO WAY… and you know shed complain and say it isn't even a woman or some tired third world oppressive bullshit that backs up her tired third world oppressive drag. The final two were Derrick Barry and Bob THE PERSON THAT IF HE DIDNT SAY DRAG QUEEN IN HIS NAME YOUD NEVER THINK HE ACTUALLY WAS ONE. Bob did an OK job, you know I'm SOUR on her so Id be hard pressed to say anything nice despite the fact she honestly is talented. Her performance was acceptable to a sourpuss so that means it was probably pretty good, not up to Sylvester standards in my book though, and there was A LOT of Dida Ritz going on there. but it was certainly a better performance than that poor cracker Derrick Barry. Im sure Derrick knew she was going home this episode so Im assuming thats why she TRIED IT with Naomi. She couldn't do it to Kimchi because that would be picking on a chunky robot with a lisp. (Kimchi on the Runway) She couldn't try it with Bob because shed just get shut down, and she couldn't try it who Chi-Chi because its unadvisable as a perfectly privileged white guy to pick on a poor black person who is much much smarter than you despite not having your opportunities and is much more talented... so she went for Naomi.. the other white girl. What Naomi said was completely true about how she, Kimchi, Chi-chi, Bob all have created something and offer that as something to behold yet derrick IMMITATES a PRE EXISTING PERSON and therefore offers... NOT MUCH. It was so interesting that Derrick JUST DIDNT GET IT. Derrick thinks he really is being somebody by BEING SOMEONE ELSE?!?!? I mean we are all amalgams of people and experiences we have observed but Derrick is a SINGULAR SPECIFIC REPETITION, not a kaleidescope of concepts! ISNT THAT FASCINATING?! Its like BETA-ism in its PURIST FORM. Thank god for these people they keep us all rich! If you go further into it the person he chooses to be, when he thinks he's being something, has no personality themselves?!?! He compared himself to Chad Michaels but CHER is A VERY different personality than Britney Spears?! Cher is a COMPLEX PERSON, Britney is a Cocker Spaniel just STARRING and waiting for you to tell it what to do?! It was all very fascinating to me. I imagine Derrick Barry has never been alone, or if he was it was "with Britney". He HAS to be the kind of person who just is ALWAYS dating someone because why wouldn't he be? How could he possibly be alone, without someone else to put himself into he is nonexistent. Is Derrick Barry a GHOST?! and ALIEN SYMBIOTE?!?!? Were on to something SINISTER!
They did the puppet thing… kinda over the puppet thing to be honest.. comes off as a teensy bit forced and they shouldn't do it again I think because if they do it again it will go from KINDA over it to TOTALLY OVER IT and then because I love the show and I fear its dying I will not show my honest emotion which is sadness and fear of being abandoned I will instead start foaming at the mouth and attack everything else that hasn't changed like the WORK ROOM and that fucking GRIM REAPER MUSIC at the beginning of Untucked!!! I was listening to Eckart Tolle while doing back today at the gym so Im making a stronger effort to be present. I CANNOT recommend his teachings and meditations series enough by the way. Ru is actually the one who gave it to me. Its GOLD…
The runway was the most interesting of the season and I really liked the 1.5 hour format. I thought the challenges were creative and I was impressed with all of their abilities except Bob and Derrick, no surprises there Im over the SLOP SHOWS between them both. Its funny that Derrick calls Bob ratchet because Derrick is just as ratchet to me. They should actually be friends. Chi-chi just impresses me so much. Im so charmed by somewhoe who can makes something out of nothing. Its TRUE WIZARDRY!!! It really is TRUE SORCERY like you basically have the ability to summon something of your creation to this plane of consciousness from nothing!! Its FIERCE! I also thought Naomi did an excellent job. Im so impressed with both of them that its hard for me to say who should win. If either win I will be happy but if either win I will also be sad. Chi-chi is golden and like your grandma, she's not CUNT, she COULD BE CUNT, and HAS BEEN CUNT, so you respect her but you also know she holds the deep wisdom to know to not waste time in anger (wish I had that ability) so she's the power of love and creation. Naomi however speaks to me personally because she upholds all that I cherish and DOES have the RAGE to SLAY and DOMINATE and TEACH. Naomi is a COBRA and Chi-chi is a cow, how am I supposed to pick?!?! They are both so important for separate but equal reasons. I can relate to both fully and respect them equally. This season is really good I think for fresh reasons. I don't know of another season where Ive been into two of the finalists equally yet for different reasons.

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Rupauls Drag Race Season 8 Episode 6 (not really) and 7

So Im totally kicking myself for not writing last week because what I was thinking was was sorta proven this week. What I was thinking was this season compared to last season we have only ONE visually stunning girl where as last season it was battle of the super models. This season were all about PEOPLE which is WEIRD because it feels nice but is also kinda HARD to judge because why should we be judging PERSONALITIES. When its just visuals or performances its fair but when it actually is Rupauls Best Friend Race its like WAIT why is this a competition? I can't say Thorgy is better than Chi chi when visually there both not exactly VIOLET CHACHKI but personality wise Id love to have dinner with them. Last week I was in a bar watching the show, where I WON THE RAFFLE and got 47 Bianca del Rio pieces of merchandise made BY AND FOR Hondurans because I couldn't fit into any of it and 40 dollars in gift cards for the bar THAT I COULDNT USE THAT NIGHT. Anyways I was sitting there thinking "Ok so I like Thorgy a lot in a club and IM NOT TRYING TO BE SHADEY as I like him, he's talented, he's smart, he's funny this is not a read BUT as far as RPDR is concerned what has he shown us STRICTLY SPEAKING THE SHOW that merits final three?" He's cool, I like him a lot as a person but like this is kind of a CONTEST and Im not really getting any big surprises. Im getting more surprises than that GOD DAMN BOB who has delivered THE WORST MAKE UP AND LOOKS OVER AND OVER AND OVER and nobody says a FUCKING THING?! This is BULLSHIT btw, if you are strictly going by the runway and performances which is what they claim to only be going by CARPET BAGGER BOB should have been RUN OUT OF TOWN ON A RAIL eons ago. If you like him I ask you this question. What has he given us as far as the world of drag is concerned that is STRONG or FRESH or CAPTIVATING??? He does good padding and actually has a better body than you'd think BUT Yes, he's been funny, and he's a talented actor but this is a DRAG COMPETITION, where is the DRAG???? What he does has nothing to do with drag. I keep saying it over and over the man is a DRAG SHAM and is just an ACTOR IN DISGUISE and I will NOT BE HAD!!!! Im the person in the crowd pointing and screaming THE EMPEROR HAS NO CLOTHES... THAT IS NOT A DRAG QUEEEN!!! Now of course Im sensitive to this as my father was LOUSY GOD DAMN LIAR so the subject of a FRAUD and REALNESS is VERY close to my heart so I realize other people may not care about this much but for me its PERSONAL!:) I realize this is insane of course but I think its important to realize why we all have particular sensibilities that we are STICKLERS ABOUT and where they come from and what we should do about them. What I should do its CHILL OUT BITCH because WERE ALL FRAUDS on some level but whatever, realness is so important. This brings us to the POWER OF CHI CHI…. HOLY SHIT Chi-Chi is real as fuck. Chi-chi works at Walmart… thats REAL. I think god likes it when were honest to ourselves and during the Thorgy vs Chi Chi lip-synch GOD MADE IT RAIN DIAMONDS ON CHI CHI… It was not deliberate, we looked back to see if it was a stunt! Her heel actually caught the beading and it snapped… Are you fucking kidding me?! You could not have made that up omg if you don't like Chi Chi you basically don't like Dolly Parton and if you don't like Dolly Parton you don't like America and if you don't like America you should probably root for Derrick Barry because she's the opposite of the freedom of choice. Britney is the POWER OF SAMENESS which is also known as COMMUNISM. The power of sameness is pretty much only good for sex in my book. Like that is where appearing "the same" or "correct" works because whatever you're attracted to is really just someone or some IMAGE appealing to your ideals of what "correct" is but it should NOT be used for reality as its HORRIBLY OPPRESSIVE. Its super important to enjoy the fantasy but know its a fantasy and that nothing is real. Most straight people will never know this and its why their lives stop at 24, by that time they've done what they're supposed to so now its time to STOP BEING A PERSON and focus on the SPAWN.
Naomi… so now I feel the final three will be Naomi, Chi-Chi and Bob with Chi Chi winning. Chi-chi would totally win if someone loaned her 3 grand, with three grand someone who sucks the meat from a turkeys neck could do A LOT. Naomi however is LOOKING REALLY GOOD. The Wizard of Oz challenge was SO GOOD?! That look was EXCELLENT, it truly was as she said Westwood meets Vidal Sassoon. In the black and white challenge she did look the best and I love that she did RAVEN, my favorite. The only issue was that the legs didn't match the rest of the body but if you don't have grey tights you can't wear fishnets on top of grey paint so… who knows. I was willing to let it slip because her black lips were like some glossy flower of death and I was the fly LURED INTO IMPENDING DOOM!
I need to take a nap, this spring weather is FUCKING WITH ME. Im like tired all the time and WEIRDER THAN NORMAL.

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Rupauls Drag Race Season 8 episode 5 Snatch Game

Snatch Game is basically the most anticipated episode/train wreck of each season. I mean I love it but its also equally full of OH GOD NO moments that make you just feel awful because I don't know if we've ever seen someone going down the path of disaster and then manage to pull in the reigns and win us over. Its basically OMG THIS IS AWKWARD MAKE IT STOP at word ONE. I wonder if were so interested and more sensitive to this because as gays were SUPER sensitive to behavior patterns and reading people so therefore "behaving wrong" basically means you could get beat up, told to behave differently, shamed, so therefore impersonation is a SURVIVAL SKILL???? I think so, but who cares, thats just an interesting point though as it also falls into the world of drag itself and then of course you reflect on your own life and realize that old Ru saying "You're born naked, the rest is drag" is true. So now you're kind of enlightened that your entire concept of self is partially A SHAM, but this is also a release because once you know none of it is real you can be the architect of your own being. There is no "real". Thank me later.
so Thorgy didn't do Madame as I said she should. The Edith Piaf quote of "use your faults" was lost on her I guess. I mean nobody has that MADAME CHIN…(actually Madame Chin is a great drag name for Thorgy should she do an asian inspired look?!). EXCEPT THORGY… I mean you put the little sticks on your wrists and its SEALED.. Whatever.. Michael Jackson was fine, well done, but who cares??? Michael Jackson isn't cool. Sorry Im mad he didn't do Madame. Eartha Kitt I actually think was kinda cute, chi-chi continues to charm me... BUT why did he pull the hair THROUGH the turban????! That was so distracting for me. "New York" ugh…millenials… just NO. Whats worse than Millenials??? GenX-ers who make SUPER SHITTY VINTAGE REFERENCES that nobody cares about and just come off like Miss Kasha Davis as the principle in Grease. She's didn't look ANYTHING like Diana Vreeland?! Fucking MADAME looks more like Diana Vreeland?! Where were the huge statement jewelry pieces, the huge nose, the grand statements that are so sorta lofty they're basically out of touch?! Seattle queens suck dude. Ok and now BOB. Sorry… not into him. I get a SNEAKY vibe on Bob. I don't trust him, he's not dishonest but he's a player and acts like he's "real" this is what you call an ACTOR. An ACTOR is different then a personality, and with a drag queen its the PERSONALITY you're attracted to, or the package, but if you get a vibe your being played I at least step back…nope… don't wanna be sold the Bob show.. can I get a REAL person over here please???. Crazy Eyes is a character on a show first off, not a person but WHATEVER, and its NOT hard to act like a retard, I do it often and Im not even trying! Im sorry, if Rosey O'donnell could pull it off, so could I. His switch to Carol Channing was a wise move. They giggled over the idea of a black Carol but neglected to realize TECHNICALLY Carol is black. She revealed it in her autobiography. Her dad was a "passable" light skinned black guy! The SHOCKER is that wasn't even the biggest reveal of the book?! Her something like 65 year DRY SPELL with her husband who after 900 years of marriage said he was GAY was WORSE?! Imagine… that poor lady waited 775 years for a dick that was NEVER GONNA SHOW UP?! Anyhow Bobs impersonation was OK, but is it hard to do Carol???.. I can do Carol.. here let me show you.. This is me, not even out of bed yet, and its better than Bobs soooo… wheres my fucking 7,000 dollar gift certificate for purses made from bicycle seats?!?!
Night of a thousand Madonnas.. or JUST ONE remixed remade remodeled… Naomis was the best but didn't all of them have like WIGGITY HAIR?? I wonder why THEY ALL privately choose geisha Madonna???! I never would. I think Id do Breathless Mahoney in the black sequin turtleneck dress. Its weird that choose that one, but I would. Although maybe not because you know who did it BETTER than Madonna was actually Phillip Blonde but maybe I still could because I just tried googling it 17 different ways and there is no proof so that means it never happened but I SWEAR IM NOT CRAZY and it WAS good!
I just had a very strong coffee and Im vibrating and pukey and need to not be sitting here. I can't think of anything else to say and its 900 degrees in my apartment… BYE!!!!!