Thursday, October 22, 2009

"Slut" no longer a definitive angle for a halloween costume.




I honestly dont know one guy who DOESNT add SLUTTY to their version of their costume.... and Im happy about that. Even my conservative fuck buddy from Jersey who has STOLEN the spare POLICE UNIFORM of his COP BROTHER for Halloween is having it tailored by HIS MOM to look EXTRA WHOREY. ( Hes "closeted"...-ish.. so how she doesnt get IT after requests like THIS and the POLLOCK COW INCIDENT (see two weeks back) is something I CANNOT FATHOM but I also know more about the social lives of mountain gorillas than I do CATHOLIC RICANS FROM JERSEY, so I dont ask and TRY not to judge (sometimes I have to try VERY HARD). He took the shirt and pants MONTHS AGO in preparation for this day mind you... and yes he already took the numbers and stuff off for you WORRY WARTS.
It does say something that all gay guys and all girls want to be ANY FORM OF HOSEBAG for Halloween. Im not sure what it is exactly but I think it means we cant judge anyone for being a TRAMP because secretly we all wish we could... that is if YOU have PEPPERED your costume with EXTRACT OF SAMANTHA FOX, and for those of you who dont and go the creative route I COMMEND YOU and I'm GENUINELY appreciative of you!.... but Im not gonna lay you.
....Ps and TOTAL SIDE NOTE: If you wear GIANT FAKE BOOBS as part of your costume I think I wanna PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE. It bugs me so much, I UN-LAUGH at it. I actually get angry only when I THINK that THEY THINK that IM supposed to laugh at it..... Maybe if I was STRAIGHT and 7 and this was 1932... Ugh giant fake boobs kill me, worse then CREME MAKEUP ON FACIAL HAIR even?!!

5 comments:

rashasha said...

Sounds like the my fake boob and cream make up over facial hair Halloween outfit won't be featured on the HOV this year, alas.

Kurt Walters said...

So, uh, the top 2 shots.. I had no idea those Ricky's pop-up Halloween stores are now in Bucharest.. golly!

WOW!! Those are such baad costumes..

youreviltwin said...

i shudder to think how one goes about making "extract of samantha fox."

do tell!

trickdog said...

Oh, I get it ... a bunch of Homo-Boys pretending to be straight white boys pretending to be black boys and black bitches.

I totally get it.

But the guy lives like a pig. maybe he really is straight. (Or is this just part of being in the closet? It gets really convoluted, doesn't it?)

Anyway, they're cute.

David Mason said...

Extract of Sammy Fox smells like Angel sprayed on fish n chips! and I think its actually MADE THAT WAY?!