Thursday, January 21, 2010

Ladies of the Jersey Shore, and Ronnie doesnt count...Bottoms arent girls!!!?!

Sammi "sweetheart": Simply a garden variety horrid manipulating female. Shes what makes you hate on females one you come into your own as a dude. I wont even go on, she doesnt even get a photo posting.
Snookie: Ok Snookie is good tv and im thankful for her, but she'd annoy the shit out of me if I had to spend any time with her. Shes the OTHER reasonS why you hate on girls when you come into your own as a dude. Im not the only person who thinks this which is why she cant get laid and why she gets PUNCHED IN THE FACE A LOT. She shuffles her feet (SO ICK), shes sloppy, and is just the proof that girls are the actual stinking loud sloppy pigs they claim guys are. I had a girl like this who lived above me once briefly, she had so much rage that even though she was only about 84 pounds she sounded like a hippo clomping around as loudly as possible upstairs. I weight 220 and im a CAT going up the stairs, some might say a PRAYING MANTIS, but this chick wanted to punish EVERYONE, every night walking upstairs as LOUD as possible and then when you complained she tried to pull that passive aggressive girl stunt bullshit as if she doesnt know that shes full of nothing but venom and rage and wants everyone to be as miserable as she is by waking them up at night as she stumbles home at 4 a.m drunk on WINE... Snookers may not be THIS and I DO like Snokkers shes real..ish, but SEE, that other horrid twat made me hate Snookie. Snookie evened her score out though with copious forms of ridiculous INDIGENOUS MATING DANCES and Im thankful for that. The demented impromptu boardwalk "REVIEW" after she was turned down multiple times was probably my favorite because it was the most desperate act of insanity Ive seen recently, but the CARTWHEELS in a TUBE DRESS and THONG were also a SOLID TEN. I like it when Snookie does cartwheels, its like shes ROLLING.
JWOWW: JWOWW is the best one of the bunch by far! She not only the most real but shes the GAY GUY. Body conscious, and not afraid to admit she appreciates a "JUICE HEAD GORRILLA" as she calls them. Shes even likes posing on sports cars JUST LIKE ME?! She KNOWS what she wants too, she even knows the difference between juice and Growth hormone which most gays dont even know. Jwoww is cool, JWOWW for the win.

PS Did anyone else watch the reunion and see Ronnies dancing? Hes a good little dancer and such a BOTTOM, did you see him do the butt grind thing where you bring your ass down to the ground and into the crothch of what is usually the MAN standing behind you? Ronnies sweet, I wanna put ronnie in a tiny pink thong and have him monkey dance for me.... Oooh maybe I dislike Sammie so much because Im jealous??!??

uh Oh, NOW I FEEL BAD... I just found the raw footage of Snookie getting punched in the face?! DAMN, she really gets POPPED! OUCH! I also just found out the guy is a wanna be UFC fighter.


Erik said...

I hope people throw garbage at the guy who punched Snookie every time he leaves the house (even though he IS a hot juice head gorilla). How dare he!

Lucien said...

AMEN - about that snookie wench

Stan said...

I loved Snookie's fuzzy house slippers!
I wonder if people watching know you have to pay 5 fucking dollars to lay on that filthy beach not to mention what you have to pay for parking in that tacky town also.

Anonymous said...

okay I give up what is the difference? Between juice and growth hormone.

David Mason said...

Theyre totally different animals, I wont go into it because I dont know the scientific details per say but the look is VERY different, the look of juice is very 80s , real puffy round like that mark mcguire dude, PUFFY.
Groth hormone on its own you end up look like Golem from lord of the rings aka Madonna, but if you mix it with steroids you sorta get amazing but toxic results, you look amphibious and super human but then as you keep doing more you get sorta morphed and monstery.

Anonymous said...

So which one should I do to not look so puffy and give the ignorant observer the idea that I earned it all in the gym from just lifting weights and eating good.

'Cause this natural shit is tiresome... but I don't wanna get puffy I hate puffy-face me. You know? On some guys it works on others its...'Oh girl, oh girl no.'

You know?

LUCIEN said...

I think Ronnie really really really would look stunning in THE SHREDDER SUIT