Friday, March 19, 2010

When the nazis take over and theyre looking for gays stay away from the PILLOW TEST TRAP!!



Every time I have a guest over they re-arrange my pillows.. and I only have 3! You'd be amazed at the shapes, pairings and CONCEPTS that the gays deliver with 3 simple pillows in my apartment?! There is one on the bed (besides the actual pillows) and 2 on the couch. The gays love to come in and re-arrange them, making THEIR little IMPRINT in MY home. It cracks me up, I had no idea. I should start documenting the arrangements with the name attached as to who arranged what kind of ensemble. I dont think I ever would have noticed until the former fuck buddy but currently closeted "DL" Puerto Rican from Jersey I had actually told me once "There were too many squares going on?!" after I notice that he had taken the pillow that was on the bed and swapped it for the round one on the couch.. even the most closeted of the gays cant resist the temptation?! Its sort of like a perfect gay test. Like next time youre at a coffee house or someones party and your not sure if the dude is gay... just wait and watch how he handles the pillows, even the most straight acting ones with ZERO design sense cant resist arranging them to their desired aesthetic?!
Btw I guess this girl hand makes the pac-man pillows above for 90$ for the set which I think is uber reasonable, but I dunno you have to contact her and I havent even tried...but I thought the idea that you could flip them over and they were the blue "dead ghost" version was super cute. Her contact page is HERE Oh and the "Etsy" site shes on I'd never heard of and is kinda cute too, its a TOUCH crafty for my tastes but its neat that you can search for items by COLOR which is a genius concept because if youre just looking for something for a room in TEAL...there you go....... nothing youd want...BUT thats just because youre not a rich, well educated, demure, north eastern or north western, slightly "granola", white girl but NONE THE LESS, there you go.... Im sure many of you have a sister who IS, and youve just found her the perfect site and you can thank House of Vader. Who knew your sister would be getting tips from a blog that has ads for GAY ROBOTS fucking GAY HUMANS on it?!
OH... So I decided to do an entire PHOTO RE-INACTMENT of the UNMITIGATED and ARBITRARY pillow arranging by gays that has gone on in my apartment. This is a cultural and psychological study!!!....I think Daniel had the best one yet personally but I altered it slightly as I prefer thing in my life to be slightly askew....





And if you really want to get into an analysis of the pillow arranging READ ON:
The original.. I dunno what it means as its hard to analyze yourself, but I can say I was inspired by that Pierre et Gilles that has the two persians in bed, though I dont even know if they had pillows in that photo but it was in the back of my head when putting them together...
The Jersey redo shows you he needs BALANCE and like our relationship prefers to have things SEPARATED and STARRING AT EACH OTHER yet together... clearly a re-inactment of his state of mind as a closeted gay.
The third version by me says "Ok I'll agree with you about having the round one on the bed (i.e Im willing to make concessions for you) but they cannot be displayed like some horrible christian living room in jersey, we'll put them TOGETHER but all FUCKED UP, one clearly the TOP and one clearly the BOTTOM" again like MY state of mind this time.
The Daniel redo is orderly and SOBER, but I think by putting them together right behind one another he wants an orderly even balanced fair relationship, and is vers. there is no obvious bottom.
The Daniel redo by me I think says, I want orderly and chic and Im open to a vers relationship BUT I want it to be a LITTLE obvious who the bottom is and I want those roles slightly featured but both "partners" on display...
SEE who knew you could learn so much from two pillows!!!!

3 comments:

gavin said...

I like your original placement the best with the round wheel.

THEN I like your readjustment of Daniel's idea.

triryche3 said...

Personally I hate throw pillows, couches or beds, just an annoyance that gets in the way.

Phillyguy said...

I'm not a pillow person either.

I think the ever changing arrangements on the leather couch are a result of the pillows simply being wrong for it. If you must, why not two bolsters in burnt orange - one on each side and the same width as that of a cushion?