Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Pretty funny...

Ok so remember I wrote my dad after not speaking to him for ten years? Well he WROTE BACK! Surprisingly his response was FINE, nothing dramatic, he thanked me and stuff but still kinda DIDNT GET IT, but whateves. I did my part and Im not gonna try and teach an old dog new tricks BUT one of the funnier parts was paper clipped to his 9 page hand written letter. It was in regards to his girlfriend in the 80s, Karin, whos house he would drop me off at so he could go to the TRACK. Karin was GERMAN and I liked her, but she liked to smoke and drink and show cleavage- which was probably why I liked her, and was basically the TOTAL OPPOSITE of my mother. My father claimed that Karin was the daughter of the "KAISERS RIGHT HAND MAN" and that her father was ASSASSINATED by the RUSSIANS. In fact my father used love to mention how Karin claimed her father had a heart attack and DROVE OFF A CLIFF but my father used to say "If thats the case then (yelling at this point) WHY WERE THERE BULLET HOLES IN THE DOOR OF THE MERCEDES?!?!"
Karin had three kids that were basically the OPPOSITE of my sister and I. Stephanie, Andy, and Kyle... I could tell AWESOME stories about Stephanie (pronounced SCHTEFNIE by Karin) but I will save that for another post but just for visuals sake SCHTEFNIE had ROD STEWARTS FACE and MOniques body and she was 16?! Andy was like 6 5", super socially awkward and a dead ringer for LURCH from the Addams Family and Kylie was the only "normal" one but I wouldnt exactly call him "cool" he had a WATER BED and raced RC cars, which to be honest.. I ENVIED. I always wanted a water bed and which I knew how to put cars together, I never had a clue. They knew a lot about cars.. WHY.. because their dad lived in a SELF MADE JUNK YARD...Thats all for another posting...
Anyhow, here is the note in regards to Karin, Kyle and Andy.. Im assuming SCHTEFNIE is a LOST CAUSE.. She WAS always the worst one ( multiple coke babies, multiple dads, ABORTION AS A FORM OF BIRTH CONTROL ETC)... but now she very well may be the FAMILY ANGEL.. Who knows... Keep it together Kyle youre their only HOPE?!?!

6 comments:

James said...

Love you. It's hard going through this, but I think you know there are loads of people out there who love and support you no matter what.

You know you can use us all as a sounding board if you need to.

xxx Jim.

NJ Master said...

I hope the letter made you feel a little better, Dave.

I find it really interesting how he writes like you do. Like, EMPHASIZING IMPORTANT words and so forth. ;)

Leatherpigboy said...

Im shocked he responded, and am sorry he just doesnt get it. At least you said what you needed to say and you can know you tried.

David Mason said...

Funny I didnt even notice the correlation between my writing and his. I MUST have picked it up from him :)

El Brucio said...

It's unfortunate, but people who don't understand what they did wrong usually won't even after it's explained to them - if they were capable of grasping the concept, it's unlikely they would have wronged you to begin with.

Still, it's nice that you heard back from him.

DOCTOR MONKEY COWBOY said...

Hilarious story.