Friday, January 7, 2011

Factoids I noticed on my sojourn to France and England......

1. Girls cruise you in Paris. This does not happen in the US, or anywhere else in Europe in my experience. Its nice, and theyre BEAUTIFUL too?! Like beautiful French girls checking you out.?! If I was straight I think i'd fuck a lot of French girls, or at least fetishize them, but I bet theyre hateful cunts, but thats sorta great for a fuck i'd think?? but dating one????! I couldnt imagine. I dont have the kind of socially masochistic tendencies that I think it would require to endure one. I mean the cigarette smoking alone?!... again great for a fuck at your place but NOT in my apartment?!

2. French guys have GREAT TITS?! All the dudes with the best pecs in the clubs were French, and not SPRING CHICKENS mind you!? I dunno what it is, but I had no idea about this fact, theyre not given credit for it. Not ALL French guys have good ones, in fact most French guys have VERY NICE faces but PEAR SHAPED silhouettes, but the ones with the great pecs seemed to be French. One dude was like 57 and had these KNOCKERS I just wanted to SUCKLE.
3. Just because someone doesnt smile the first, or even the second, or even the FIFTH time you smile at them doesnt mean they HATE AND YOURE UGLY. Every single dude I smiled out turned out to be friendly, every single one! It just takes more to get through to some people I guess.
4. They sell poppers in the vending machine at Gym Louvre... wow.

5. I will never get the whole thing of doing drugs when the SUN IS OUT, and Im not talking about SMOKING WEED ON A BEACH?! Im talking about going out all night and then when the party is CLEARLY OVER people still shoveling uppers in their head for what seems like no good reason to me... Im happy I do not get this. Moderation is a NOVEL CONCEPT in the UK, not even joking. I SLIGHTLY MODERATED my behavior when I went out the first night and people talked about it like it was this AMAZING NEW IDEA theyd never considered and it WAS because they HADNT?!?! That said going out in London is the most fun anywhere on Earth in my opinion. The people might be fucked up but they at least socialize, are smart, and some are even quite sexy and funny.
6. Food in France is always better.
7. The subway in London costs about 6.50$?! Everything seems reasonably priced (though totally expensive) in London, except for transportation which is curiously costly.
8. Steroids REALLY WORK for Mr. London, they all look SO MUCH cuter then they did ten years ago?! It somehow works with their earthy esthetics. Like who knew muscles and bad teeth would be.... CHARMING?! It gives them this rough surly edge that just works with their looks. Like its the opposite of the effect of pretty faces on mones. Like pretty modely faces get BUSTED when they take mones because there is this clash that just throws everything off in my opinion and they end up looking "off" and "processed", where as these British guys looked a little SCRAPPY before but now with the mones they look SURLY and its attractive. Less CHIMNEY SWEEP EFFECT and more DESCENDANT OF A ROMAN LEGIONIERE realness. yum. (ps Im not saying this dude is british but its sort of the effect theyre working there.)
9. I think Paris has the easiest subway to understand out of any large city Ive been to with a respectable subway system.
10. Selfridges is the best department store in London in my opinion, not that you can afford anything with the price increase from dollar to pound, but I found a sweater that was like 75% off that I could BARELY afford and picked up. The large wide open floor plan makes it fun to sort of wander from label to label, its a tiny bit like the CANDYLAND board game that way.

7 comments:

fairviewsue said...

Yes, food is WAY better in France. This also goes for Italy. But be warned, one can gain weight in those countries! [This is probably not an issue for you yet, since you are still in your youth!]

I do not even look at clothes in some countries in the EU, because they are so expensive. Well, I did window shop in Paris, but just for laughs. I am very surprised you found something and in London no less!

I could not abide smoking; I have never dated anyone who had that habit. Sounds like you had a really great time!!! I am so glad!

brando said...

Stop hating women! haha! They're not all cunts out to strip you of your masculinity!

Lucien said...

We missed you Dave - NYC is better with you back - Glad you had an adventure of a life time there

David Mason said...

Brandon.... Go to France before you say that....

Sue said...

Brando has not met my mother...

http://fairviewsue.wordpress.com/

sobehotfun said...

In my experience, Parisian guys have super asses too. At every gym, sauna and sex club, it's one beautiful bubble butt after another--even on guys who aren't otherwise that built. Is it from all the walking they do?

Willy B said...

In defence of those in London who go out all night and then continue (I mean, whoever they are, not like I would know them or anything), the sun is never out.

And 6am is early.