Thursday, April 21, 2011

Toreros have inspired me to blog again..... and self loathing queens need to have spears thrown at them!




Im sorry I havent been writing much, after the charity, the tax season, the trip to iceland, I have just been EXHAUSTED and honestly want to do NOTHING. No projects, no blogging, blah blah blah. The problem with that is when Im not working, blogging, etc I become disassociated and unhappy. So I guess I have to start blogging...This morning I have FINALLY been inspired to write.
Toreadors, toreros, bull fighters, Im not sure what Im supposed to call them, are FIERCE. I wanna be a Torero for Halloween but the costumes are like 3,000 dollars and finding one for some 6 3" is impossible, so I'd have to get it custom made, though Id GAG to have one. I know they make commercial adult ones but they are SKANK, and I dont know if youve noticed but I dont take my Halloween costume lightly and I dont mind shelling out the dough to do so. I feel like my Halloween costume is an annual embodiment of gratitude to gods and a measure of the quality of my life. I cant decide if Id want purple and black with red accents or hot pink and gold..... I also think Id want to carry a FAN though, the cape is LAME - the sword is cool, but I am too much of a SPAZ to walk around with a SWORD. Id take someones eye out... and fans are major. Especially when youre in SPAIN and MEN... WITHOUT HESITATION... flick them open with a CRACK... I LIVE. It actually makes me VERY happy, even when a TACKY QUEEN does it. I cant help it, I inwardly applaud...
I know nothing about opera but I it makes sense that this major song that you hear ALL THE TIME is for a MARCH OF TOREADORS...






Ok when I was searching for pictures I came across all these and now I am not only inspired by but also HOT for bull fighters. They are the PERFECT combo of MACHO and FLASH... with those high waisted pants and the bolero jacket they serve TIGHT AND TINY waist fetish, which I actually love. I know theres that book out with photographs of them but its all trying to be MACHO yet all CROTCH SHOTS so they removed all the FLARE and printed it in BLACK AND WHITE... LAME... way to RUIN IT Mr. Self Loathing gay guy who made the book?! I mean if the STRAIGHT GUYS who actually do the bull fighting WANT to wear flashy beautiful colors and then you go and document them all in BLACK IN WHITE?!? SO TYPICAL, if I were those dudes Id be OFFENDED and as someone who LOVES COLOR I wanna punch you in the face for the GREAT OFFENSE of taking one of the FEW things in this world that is MASCULINE and simultaneously celebrates color and you "self loathe it" into MEDIOCRITY by removing the joy because you hate yourself therefore anything perceived as "gay" has to be REMOVED because its "bad". So now youve created a conundrum because YOU are now BAD so youre FUCKED and will be UNHAPPY your entire life and will then try an impose your misery on others by hating on anything you perceive as "gay" and try and pass it off as "masculine" behavior... WRONG YOU PUSSY. I LOVE COLOR and I GUARANTEE I can BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU, in fact I PUBLICLY CHALLENGE YOU TO A FIGHT! ( Im especially sensitive to this right now and went on this RANTY TANGENT because I went to a friends house for Rupauls Drag Race on Monday and a bunch of us were there including this new queen who NOBODY INVITED and is NOT OUT TO HIS PARENTS but is a FULL OBNOXIOUS QUEEN, just one of those ROTTEN GAYS that are simultaneously SELF LOATHING, LOUD, POORLY EDUCATED, DELUDED, TACKY and TRYING TO SAY THINGS TO OTHERS IN HOPES THAT IF YOU BELIVE THE BULLSHIT THEYRE TRYING TO SELL THEY MIGHT TOO was there and exclaimed when seeing the commercial for Johnny Weirs show "I HATE THAT QUEEN" all of us RAISED AN EYEBROW but kept our TRAPS SHUT. I didnt know the bitch and I didnt know if the host was good friends with him so I didnt CUT HIM TO PIECES but what I LOVED is the next day the host emailed me saying "Can you believe that SELF LOATHING bitch saying he hates Johnny Weir CLEARLY because Johnny is OUT, TALENTED, HAPPY, and GETTING ATTENTION?!" ) ...
I wanna put on one of these outfits, strut into a colloseum, have these two aforementioned queens enter on the other side of the ring STRIPPED NAKED and THROW SPEARS AT THEM!...( ahhh blogging really does help me feel "myself" again. ... and speaking of FEELING MYSELF AGAIN.. That picture of the pastel green uniform ripped open to reveal MEGA HAIRY GROIN?!... I AM IN LOVE!!! The pink socks with the spear on them ... AWESOME.... I want a bullfighter BF.. When I was searching for pics I came across a MEGA gruesome one that I wont even post of a toreador with the bulls horn going UP THROUGH THE BOTTOM OF HIS JAW AND OUT HIS MOUTH ?!?!? ACK?!?! Did it rip his jaw off?! Ack it had to?! Aye aye aye.... Dont kill my boyfriend?!!

8 comments:

CoutureNeger said...

Love the post!! I like bullfighters as well. They're pretty hot and pretty brave to deal with an animal that can be quite uncontrollable.

I'm not a fan of that self hating closet case that you had to deal with. Queens like that need to be read to a box and sent to their parents with a note attached, outing them. There's no need to spit your hatred about another queen who is doing well. If you're not a fan, there is another way to say it without sounding like a bitter queen.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I enjoy your blog and I love ALL of the pics here. Keep it up!!

Holly said...

Dave,

I think you need to go with hot pink and gold. I mean, purple and red could get into New Power Generation territory, which is awesome, if you're Prince. You need to do this I think. And a fan! Yes!

Living Horus said...

Hi David

If you like Torero, then check out this guy's art, it is extremely sexy, Ruven Afanador, I think you will like it ;-)

David Mason said...

Thanks for the kind words Eric! :)

Anthony said...

AHH!! great post. i haven't been following much lately as i've been overwhelmed with orders myself. Why must queens wait till the last minute to order gowns? Ugg.. I digress.

You in a bullfighter uniform would be pretty epic. Though i think I'd do purple with gold embroidery accented in fuchsia. Though the bright green and gold with pink socks really makes me happier than it should. I mean REALLY, how often do you get to wear knee high pink sox with ANY color you want and KNOW that u are in the right? You just have to live it up and wear something so that they will stand out. We all know you have the calves for it.
And can i suggest it be made of something somewhat sheer? The breeches SCREAM see through. Specially the guy getting the recital exam by the bull. It would just make the whole look ridiculous and over the top.

Legaria said...

no trolling but, why do toreadors have to kill and torture a bull? they lose all hotness to me

Malibu Eric said...

I cannot imagine what the photo of the jaw piercing looks like, since I screamed "OH MY GOD!" 12 times when I saw the pic of the bullhorn going through the guy's leg. Must reach for a nerve pill....

Lawrence said...

Anytime I fantasize about having a Bullfighter lover I simply play Madonna's,"Take A Bow" video. I copied your earlier rant about self loathing gays and why gays don't support gay celebrities and shared it with all my friends. Your analogy about the Johnny Weir hating queen at the tv party is exactly why I love your beautiful mind and read your wonderful blog!