Courtneys beautiful mistake of going on Rupauls Drag Race and then being unappreciated by the majority of the public was an outcome I did not expect at all and goes to show you what Rupauls Drag Race is really about. I like to think its a show about creativity, uniqueness, nerve and talent but its nice to realize its less about artifice or skill and sorta more about us finding that incredibly rare SPARK OF LIFE. That MOMENT OF CREATION we all felt when we experienced a sense of SELF, and we lust to find it in others. I think the reason why we unconsciously want to find it so bad is that when witnessing it we feel UNDERSTOOD. We see it and go "YES!!! YESS THATS IT!! YOU KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT ME!?!" It speaks to us on a extraordinarily personal level and means so much to us and we don't even know it. I think its sorta why Im "EH" about this season no matter who wins. I don't feel that spark with Bianca but I do respect her talents and abilities and I do see it when Adore performs but I don't respect her lack of a honed sense of self. Its in her face and in her performance but she hasn't completed the package yet. She's carbon thats CLOSE to becoming a diamond but its not quite there yet, it needs more time.
I think Courtney is quite an honest and accomplished queen actually but what the RPDR fans out there are looking for is someone who is passionate about being a DRAG QUEEN and Courtney seems (we must remember all these queens are at the mercy of the editors) passionate at being a TALENT. Which she is, but despite what we THINK, its not what were looking for. This is going to come off like a read but I feel Courtney would do REALLY WELL with straight crowds. I'm sure the audience who is pulling for her is more of the straight crowd because for them that passion isn't something they're going to relate to or need and for them they're looking at her going "She's clearly the winner.?!" and for their needs they would be totally correct. People who need that particular spark though are really very willing to let talents or looks slide for that MAGIC OF PASSION. Courtney is basically without flaw, nobody is reading her for her decision making abilities or talents. I think she's great and Im very happy to support her, we need more talent like hers out there. Were all just basically turned off that she's a a career actor, not some weirdo kid who we can relate to for wanting to be adored and worshipped, and exciting, and glamorous and weird and POWERFUL. She's someone who's mom put her in front of camera at 4 years old and she did a good job of doing what other people told her to do. Less of an oddball using his talents to transform into something terrific and more of a circus poodle. Something she deserves an award for for coming out normal, just not THIS award.
Is Courtney the biggest loser on Rupauls Drag Race history? I feel like the show may have ruined her career? If she never went on the show would we all be like "Why isn't Courtney Act on the show? shed totally win?!" or would we not know her? I can't say. I guess she WAS here for a while and nobody mentioned her? Like the rest of us she thought shed be explosive as well and it majorly back fired. Instead of being wowed we were CLOCKING HER AS A FAKE. She NEVER should have showed us that pageant winning photo of "Little Mr Oroolooroo" or whatever it was, and when she first said "I tried out for Australian Idol as a boy and they weren't interested, so I tried out as a girl and I got chosen." We felt like "Oh good for you!" but now we look back and its like "OOOOH, you didn't do it as a girl because its what you wanted to in the first place and were too scared to come out as "yourself". You did it as a girl because it was "I WANT TO BE FAMOUS AND I WILL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO SUCCEED!" Thats less like passion about the art of drag and more like NERVE and LUST which I can respect mildly but its approaching art from the wrong reasons. Its almost like we all wanna yell FAKE FAKER FAKETY FAKE FAKE! We don't because she IS VERY GOOD at what she does and WE ALL RESPECT IT. I really like her! She IS just like any of us, she IS beautiful, but I think as gays its INCREDIBLY CRUCIAL that we see the VERY PERSONAL ATTACHMENT AND REASON WHY THE DRAG IDENTITY EXISTS and it can't be because you're really very good at it. It has to be because you've been in the dirt and in that dirt you created a seed and that seed grew and blossomed into something captivating and strong and well almost PUNGENT. Courtney is kinda like a rose you buy from a florist. Its lovley, its EVERYTHING ITS SUPPOSED TO BE but you forgot to recognize that store bought flowers have nearly NO PERFUME AT ALL, which was the entire reason why roses were given in the first place.
Im very sorry that it came off this way for Courtney but I don't think its THAT BAD, I mean now she's a name that all of America knows and she can most likely turn it to her favor. She's a pro and I would love to see her do so, she deserve it. I am happy however to see that as gays we all still uphold this unconscious moral standing and value the importance of "realness". Its not about looks, its not about lip synching, its about artistic integrity aka PASSION. The drive and zest behind why a person does what they do may be one of the purest forms of honesty and that honesty brings us security AND something we can relate to and in the end, more then love even, people want to be understood and to trust someone. Finding that spark in someone is like looking into the cosmos itself! Its basically THE POWER OF CREATION. Its that swirly magic we all wish we had as kids and the thing is when we see it in someone we are confirmed THAT IT IS REAL and that gives us comfort and joy that no artificial thing ever could!