Thursday, January 8, 2015

Sticking a needle in your but to inject steroids has an interesting mental effect.

Sticking a needle in your but to inject steroids has an interesting mental effect.

Its strangely empowering to know that when you stick this metal object into your own flesh that you can drive it into your own body and you survive. I think unconsciously we have this notion that if we are penetrated we can die and this makes you feel like you can be penetrated and NOT die which gives you this strange rush of "power" or sense of control over death which is our greatest unconscious fear?
Its empowering to know you're not only penetrable but also with the results of the steroids MUTABLE which is very different to most peoples concept of themselves. I feel most people, myself included as I think multiple things about the process, think they are their own body AS ONE complete with soul and mind but this process makes a very clear break in that idea and you realize that your body is CHANGEABLE and more under your own control then you think. Its not something you're not under control of. It makes you aware of your body as more of a VEHICLE for your "soul" than one unit as a whole. This in turn wildly changes your psyche. I almost feel like this is why many of my friends have altered their appearance or work in the vanities or "arts of appearance" because they understand and share this concept. I wonder if because of this it also gives you an inflated ego? It would be very easy to blame these effects on the steroids themselves but I believe THE PROCESS is also part of the state of mind.
and yes that is my own ass with a needle full of pink sugar in it. I back my own shit up.

House of Vader

1 comment:

orlando said...

It strikes me as odd that someone as smart as you does steroids.